I poke badgers with spoons

It's official. The stupidest shoppers in the world can be found at Toys R Us. I supposed this doesn't come as a shock to anyone who actually frequents Toys R Us, but I believe the last time I was in a Toys R Us was around 2 years ago.

There I was, trying to find a large inflatable beach ball. And some harpie was having a complete meltdown, yammering at her husband about how ANGRY she was that she could find something she was after in the Summer Fun section. Her husband was about the size of Chewbacca and continually stood in the way of my cart while he tried to placate his harpie wife with "honey, what about this?" "honey, what about that?" while she continued to tirade about how ANGRY she was.

Lady, it's a Toys R Us. Find a real problem before you get angry.

But I'm going to put her yuppie stupidity out of my mind because tonight we go see Eddie Izzard!

First I must go chugalug some iced tea. I've been on liquid restriction most of the day since it was marathon hair appointment day, which means I'm sitting in the chair for 2 hours while she colors and cuts. Nobody wants to have to pee while wearing a salon robe and sporting Medusa hair full of dye.