While in Starbucks, I noticed their holiday chalkboard (and do they have the same chalk artiste just go from store to store to draw these things?) featured something called Espresso Truffle.
Naturally, they had my attention.
“ohmygawdohmygawd, what is this espresso truffle goodness??” <-- Me
“Oh! It’s espresso with chocolate and steamed milk!!” <-- Nice barista girl
Uhhh…wha?
I decide to conduct a more extensive investigation on starbucks.com:
Espresso Truffle
We’ve combined Starbucks espresso with our premium European-style cocoa blend used in our Signature Hot Chocolate and steamed milk, and topped it with whipped cream and a touch of chocolate powder. This sophisticated beverage delivers rich chocolate flavor with a velvety mouthfeel balanced with a smooth coffee flavor.
This differs from the mocha...how?
Caffe Mocha
Rich, full-bodied Starbucks® espresso combined with our proprietary bittersweet mocha syrup and steamed milk. Topped with a cloud of whipped cream.
Kaaaaayy. So one is made with bittersweet cocoa powder and one is made with bittersweet syrup. Right. They differ from each other in that.... How?
Tall Espresso Truffle, no whip: 310 calories, 8 grams saturated fat
Tall Caffe Mocha, 2%, no whip: 200 calories, 6 grams saturated fat
So they differ in that the Espresso Truffle is made from whole milk and the regular mocha is 2%? There’s no milk option on the former, so this is my guess.
Oh, Bill Nye, where are you when the world needs you??
Can I get a marketing job at Starbucks? Please, somebody pay me to come up with the exact same beverage and put a posh spin on it so people will buy it by the gallon, and I can then buy an Infiniti G35 with my You Saved the Company By Coming Up with the Same Exact Beverage bonus.
The Organ Made Out of Cave
4 hours ago
12 comments:
If you get the job, see if you can get my Hazelnut shot-in-the-dark on the menu. Freakin snobs won't serve flavored coffee.
That's okay, I argued with the register girl at Starbucks today for about 10 minutes.
me: "double tall cappuccino"
her: "tall cappuccino?"
me: "double tall"
her: "so, a grande?"
*long silence*
me: "no, tall, with two shots"
her: "our grande comes with two shots"
me: "I don't want a grande, I want a tall with two shots"
her: "our vente comes two shots as well"
*another long silence*
Barista who's overheard entire conversation: "it's okay, I got it, double tall cappuccino"
me: thank you
register girl: "I didn't know you could get two shots in a tall"
me: "you're dumber than a sack of hair."
Okay, I didn't actually say that last line, but I wanted to.
V - my caffeine addicted brother...why don't you just ask for a half shot of hazelnut syrup? Enough to add flavor but not make it gagworthy sweet.
Wow. You sisters really do love your coffee. The only thing I ever order from the fancy coffee houses are: Chai Tea Latte or London Fog.
I know, I'm a light weight.
Now I have to refer back to our previous conversation where you said you were not: Becky Homecky or something like this. Yes??
TOO Fing FUNNY!
Why? Cuz not only did I love mother scratcher, but... ok, here's the thing, my name is Elizabeth but for the first 4 years of my life I was called Becky. No it's not my name (not on birth cert)and not short for Elizabeth (wtf?). It's just what they called me. So Becky Homecky... that made me snarf.
Ohmygawd! You went to Starbucks without me?
1) Yum
2) I still don't know a) the difference of the drinks you mentioned and b) the difference between grande and tall, as mention by vivi.
3) I suggest Quik Trip's mocha cuppuccino. It's delicioso, and much cheaper. Oh, and less snobby.
I'm not a coffee drinker. I feel so left out.
V - Do what my sister says. She knows everything.
Sister - You made me spew my tea with that sack of hair comment.
Elizabeth - I drink chai ALL the time. I love it! No idea what a London Fog is, however. And I remember hearing Becky Homecky from one of my cousins when I was jr high. It was really the only funny thing she's ever said.
Sarah - You probably just gave Vivi apoplexy by mentioning Quik Trip since that's probably powdered coffee. She breaks out in hives over this sort of thing. But trust me, Starbucks here are not snobby since they're EVERYWHERE. Often two to a strip mall in addition to one inside the grocery store. Every troglodyte who just rolled out of bed inhabit our Starbucks.
Tracey - Don't feel left out. I don't drink much coffee since it hurts my tummy (I'd really think that either Vivi or I were adopted if we didn't have the same brain wiring). I only buy treats like mochas on the weekends! But I do drink tea ALL DAY LONG.
OMG, did you just use the word troglodyte? NBD, it's just like one of my top 10 favorite words of all time!
Say it with me ... OHMYGAWD!
WHOA!!!!!!!!
You two are sisters? Like flesh and blood sisters? Vivi and Amy? Seriously?
I was intrigued by your blogs because of the sassy sarcasm. Now I know it's genetic! LOL
Troglodyte is one of the greatest words in the English language! It's SO spot-on descriptive.
Yes, flesh and blood sisters. We share sarcasm and eyebrows.
London Fog is a fancy Earl Grey with a whole lotta froth. Starbucks makes an ok one, they have a different name for it, but I have no idea what it is and so I just order it as a LF and they seem to understand. I don't know if you have Esquires Coffee where you live but they make the best LF.
Thanks. You gave me an idea. No fair trying to steal it: Do you think I can get rich by convincing Starbucks to sell COFFEE?
For giggles, note the website:
http://mystarbucksidea.force.com/ideaHome -- by the way, this "old guy" welcomes instruction on how to insert hyperlinks into these things...
Yeah, there's only so much you can do with Espresso and milk and occasionally chocolate. More ingredients would help.
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