hrrrm?

It appears that Blogger was hungry this morning and randomly ate a few of my posts. Well fine, I hope that Blogger is fortified by my inane morsels and has a fine day.

Speaking of "hrrrm," working for a living is really cramping my style. Now, I will never speak of work here since that would be highly inappropriate given my position, BUT I will say that having to get out of bed every morning at 6 am is seriously WRONG. Especially when my husband gets up at 5 am, so I'm having to listen to the alarm starting somewhere around 4:45. I was so happily asleep this morning, too, which is somewhat of a rarity.

I had this fancy idea that moving to France might be a nice change, but now I hear that even the French are doing away with the 32-hour work week. What is the world coming to when one can't even have a cush schedule in France? Mon dieu.

Oh, Mittens, you so crazy!

It is so beautifully sunny today, so I’m having a difficult time staying focused. When you know your sunshine is limited and likely won’t be seen for another six months, the brain wanders when it is a glorious day.

I just read the funniest liberal elitist blog update of the day. I’ve been more than amused at all the leaks coming out of the McCain campaign about how irritated these staffers are about Palin continuing to go off-script…not that script was doing her any good in the first place, unless inciting racism and encouraging white trash alcoholics from sea to shining sea is your idea of Real Americanism.

BUT the bestest thing I read today is that many of these anti-Palin insiders are actually former Mitt Romney staffers. Oh sweet taste of venomous repudiation! The fanboys jumped to the McCain campaign on the gamble that their Mittens would get the nod as VP, and now they are pissed as hell and feeling no shame about spilling on the dirt on the utter incompetence of Caribou Barbie.

Apparently the strategy now is to take their pounds of flesh from Palin in order to position their Mittens as the leader of the party for, yes, the next election. Another part of this strategy is apparently jockeying for jobs with the RNC in order to prop up their Magic Underwear Boy for the nom in 2012.

I love it when they begin to eat their own. I realize that it’s a sad state of American politics, but I love this shit. Course, it’s easier to love when it’s not happening to the Democrats. I do love to see how the mighty Republican beast is turning on itself like a bad zombie movie.

Love? Did I say love? Love, love, love.

[/grand hyperbole of the day]

astrologicaloco

My Sunday horoscope because it is to laugh:

The embers of your social life have been glowing slowly but steadily for weeks, and today they are about to explode into a fiery festival of fun! Your people have tons of good things going on, and they will want to make sure you are as involved as possible. Try to get boring tasks and errands out of the way early, today -- save the afternoon and evening for last minute parties and other types of social stuff. You deserve to take a break and have a good time.

A fiery festival of fun! Dude, that was SO my life today.

Yeah.

And now - it gets even better - I'm going to bed so I can wake up to MONDAY.

Sweet.

Although since I haven't been able to sleep more than 4 to 5 hours a night for the past week, we'll see how this sleeping idea goes. I'm getting tired of being tired.

the glories of Saturday

Wake up when it's DAYLIGHT. This is quite a thing of wonder now that it's dark til 8 am.

Go to grocery store.

Do laundry.

Go out for lunch and eat gigantor cheesy turkey melt and 5,624 french fries.

Waste an entire hour farfing about on the internets.

Go buy a mocha.

Clean a bathroom. Procrastinate about cleaning the other one because it's Saturday, and I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT, NEENER NEENER.

Listen to awesome Goth 80's tunes really loudly.

Buy a pair of shoes I don't actually need.

And it's only 4:00. So many other slothful, greedy, gluttonous things I could still fit in before the day is over.

Hmm, I forgot to exercise, though. Funny that.

This Fake American just doesn't get it

So the McCain campaign has spent $150,000 on shopping sprees for Sarah Palin, plus a $4,000 haircut.

Maybe since I'm a Fake American, I am impaired to a point of not being able to understand how much money the McCain campaign spends on their wimmen-folk to make them palatable to that Real American demographic.


According to financial disclosure records, the accessorizing began in early September and included bills from Saks Fifth Avenue in St. Louis and New York for a combined $49,425.74.

The records also document a couple of big-time shopping trips to Neiman Marcus in Minneapolis, including one $75,062.63 spree in early September.

The RNC also spent $4,716.49 on hair and makeup through September after reporting no such costs in August.

Mmmmmkay.

So my question is this: Why does she still look like a mall rat? Or is it just because I’m a liberal elitist America-hater that I don’t get it? I’m sure that must be it since Seattle is no doubt on the McCain-Palin Fake America map.

And by the way, anyone who hasn’t seen The Daily Show’s brilliant report on Real America vs. Fake America from Monday night’s show, go to their site RIGHT NOW. Watch the Jason Jones report from Wasilla as well.

I alone can beat death's design

You know you're old when you find this exciting:

When we were at Costco on Saturday, I found a 2-pack of Calvin Klein
bras for $22!!

And...AND...the new Costco coupon book had one for $7 off Nexxus
Humectress conditioner. Dude! I'm a savvy shopper all over town! I
was so impressed with myself.

Oh, and I bought a black zip cardigan for 16 bucks. And it's not a
flimsy piece of crap like the ones they have at The Gap for $45.
Although it was funny, as I was pawing through the sweaters, this lady
next to me said, "Can you tell me what size my pants are? These are the
same ones, but I can't remember what size these are." So there I am
fishing down the back of this nice ladies Ralph Lauren jeans to see her
tag while my husband pretended like that wasn't happening right next to
him.

And then I spent the rest of my weekend cleaning, doing laundry, and
watching really hilariously bad horror movies on TV. Yes, I did watch
Final Destination 1, 2, AND 3. And guess what: THEY ALL DIE. Really. Crazy, no?

I am such a cheap date.

But it gets better! I also watched that talking sex with mom & dad show on MTV.

Yes, really.

Please, somebody bring back Celebrity Rehab! I'm not sure I *heart* Dr. Drew enough to continue to watch hootchie teenagers and their hootchie parents.

My week

Wake up too early, but don’t mind since am on vacation.

Hit the Bellagio pool in the range of 8-8:30 a.m.

Breakfast poolside on chocolate croissant and FREE iced tea (the only free thing at Bellagio)

Sit in pool

Turning 5,000 degrees by 11 am, so get out of pool and go shopping

Room is spotless upon every return to hotel.

There is chocolate.

There are clean towels upon every return to hotel.

Put money in slot machines and actually win on two occasions, totaling approximately $300

Pick numbers on Keno. Do not understand what the frack Keno is. Win $13 to help pay for lunch.

Drink alcoholic beverages while walking around shopping

Stuff face on overpriced but large quantities of food

Nearly convince self that $400 Michael Kors bag is a must-have until sister talks sense in mojito-induced fog

Begin to believe that every day for the rest of my life can be started with chocolate croissant and leisurely pool soaking

***ABERRANT NOISE OF SCREECHING BRAKES COME THURSDAY***

Wake up at 5 am when husband’s alarm goes off. Must get out of bed at 6 am. Must go to work and sit in office for 9 hours. Must not drink alcohol. Have no access to chocolate croissant.

There is no sun.

There is only dark in the mornings.

There is rain.

There are very large piles of work to do.

There is still no help for large piles of work to do.

There is distinct possibility that husband may be laid off before he reaches 5 years just when he was happily making progress in new position. A 5-year curse that has occurred at every company he’s ever worked for.

There are no clean towels upon every return home.

Bathroom sink has not been cleaned in over a week.

Will not even mention condition of toilets or kitchen floor.

Vacation is so over.