I am 12 years old, thank you

I had BIG plans for the weekend. First, I was going to have a sparkling clean home first thing Saturday morning in preparation for company at lunch. Then I was going to have a fantastic power walk due to the fact that winter has turned me into Fatty McButterpants.

On Sunday I was going to get up early and quest for a spring jacket (important in this part of the world), then go for another power walk, and then spend a relaxing afternoon reading Pillars of the Earth (no, not because Oprah read it, just because of a word-of-mouth recommendation).

Here's what really happened:

Slept til 8:30 on Saturday. Mad-dashed to Trader Joe's. Vacuumed. Determined guest bathroom was clean enough. Shut doors to all other rooms in the house.

Ate copious amounts of pizza and apple pie (and ice cream) for lunch.

Went to Target and bought cute pink plaid jammie pants. Went to Barnes & Noble and bought a birthday present (accomplishment!). Smelled chocolate chip cookies baking at the "Barnes & Noble Cafe" (Please! It's a Starbucks! Just take the Starbucks gift cards!) Went to grocery store and bought chocolate chip cookie dough. Went home, ate miso soup and baked chocolate chip cookies. Subsequently ate cookies. Tried to read Pillars of the Earth. Almost fell asleep.

Slept til 7:30 on Sunday (doing better). Read paper...and magazines. Didn't dress until 10:00 am. Didn't leave house until 11:15 am (after eating more pizza). Spent fruitless 90 minutes at mall interally screaming about the stupidity of jackets with 3/4 sleeves. If it is warm/dry enough to wear 3/4 sleeves, I don't need to wear a jacket! (Probably uttered this out loud as well.)

Returned home to eat cheese and crackers (more cheese than cracker). Went to library to pick up chick lit books (sorry, Ken), then coffee date. Returned home, changed from public clothing to Han Solo t-shirt and new jammie pants (at 3:00 pm). Bought sweater online (telling myself it was a purchase in lieu of new jacket; am best friends with inner voice). Made nachos (small plate!). Ate two more cookies. Watched Pride & Prejudice on PBS. Ate scrambled eggs and toast. Oh, and an apple! (w/peanut butter) Watched Something Wicked This Way Comes. Ate two more cookies. Watched conclusion of Con Air on TNT. Watched beginning of Doom on TNT. Forced myself to go to bed, despite actually wanting to see how Doom ended (yes, really).

But I did take out the garbage AND roll it to the curb!